Here comes the choo choo

Obligatory theme: train tracks!

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The Return of Dr. Mabuse (Im Stahlnetz des Dr. Mabuse)

Grade: C

Well, it's murder on the sauerkraut express for this 1961 entry in the Dr. Mabuse "series." Fritz Lang directed the first three, over a period of nearly 40 years(!); this movie follows Lang's last effort, and is the first in a string of Mabuse films shot in the '60s. (The last [or is it?] appearance of the evil doctor is in the 1989 remake-ish Docteur M. -- looks like the actor who plays Mabuse in Return even has a part!)

Somewhat interesting history aside, the film wasn't all that impressive. It starts promisingly enough with a whole lot of those German-style shadows and a woman torched to death by a passing flamethrower (pretty gruesome stuff, that), but soon all the stock characters start showing up: police inspector on a personal mission, female reporter sticking her nose where it doesn't belong, handsome FBI guy who might possibly be a double agent (or some third guy named Bob), sinister warden with extra sinister facial hair -- even the brilliant-scientist-held-prisoner who happens to be the female lead's dad!

Perhaps that's all a bit uncharitable, because the film had us guessing right up to the end about the identity of the mysterious Mabuse. Perhaps we wouldn't be guessing if we had seen the previous films (though we later learned this Mabuse fellow is supposed to be a master of disguise, which kinda makes the question of who the actor is a moot point). Even if we had seen the Lang "originals", I still think the ending (back on the train tracks, even!) would have been a bit of a letdown. Ah, well -- the film has its charms, but not a real standout in our book.

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Terror at the Red Wolf Inn (aka Terror House)

Grade: B

Much like Snowbeast, They, and (K's personal favorite) Idaho Transfer, this one has nuance and charm that put it (severed) head and shoulders above most of the uninspired box schlock we've had to muddle through.

Sweet, lonely, and a bit dense (but endearingly so), college student Regina hops a plane to the bucolic Red Wolf Inn after having "won" a trip from some mysterious letter. Along with the other guests -- a couple of sweetly airheaded young ladies ("Hi, I'm a model!" declares Pamela) -- Regina sits down with the inn's proprietors and their man-child of a grandson, Baby John, for a meal of epic proportions. And boy, do these folks know their meat.

As the models disappear one by one, it doesn't take long to figure out why the old folks don't want Regina near their meat locker -- but this turns out to be so much more than just another hack-em-to-bits cannibal flick. There's a thread of dark humor tinged (drenched, really) with the absurd, such that we could be walking along the beach -- dum-de-dum-de-dum -- and WHAM! the most bizarre romantic overture/sharkicide that we've seen to date.

Other bonuses include the music ("Pomp and Circumstance" rarely gets a chance shine outside of commencement ceremonies, and will be forever in our minds associated with delicious "filet") and the quality of the acting (Linda Gillen, as Regina, is particularly well-suited for her role). We wish we could have seen the "uncut" version, which apparently contains an additional 12 minutes of delicious, fleshy fun; however, if it's all you can get, the 78 minute version is still well worth watching.

(Almost forgot -- the train tracks show up during a late-in-the-film escape scene. . . we won't be jerks and spoil the rest.)